Fear Not

Tue, 23 Feb 2010 23:42:12 -0800

I learned today of the passing of a remarkable person who was admired by many and who has left a tremendous legacy behind them. This person was always warm and endearing to me, and it was an honor to have seen in life the impact they had on others.
Tonight as I listen to the rain beating against my weathered roof, I think of the inevitable end we all face. So many thoughts come to pass as I look over the landscape of my life thus far. Many shadows of the valleys I dredged through lie beneath the brief mountaintops of victories past.
I fear the past at times and I often worry it may afford an opportunity to entangle the present and enslave the future. It is a too familiar fight to keep the fear of not meeting up to my own expectations or proclaiming absolute freedom from past failures out of my mind. Most of all I fear not stewarding this life I was given to the full extend of what God desires me to do with it.
I recall an idea about fear that my grandmother once told me. She said that fear appears as an enormous and all intimidating wall. This wall is blocking you from the desired result that lies just beyond the other side. This wall of fear is impossible to go around and cannot be avoided for too long. The only way to surpass it is to enter through it.
Once you march into it, you will find that this all-intimidating wall of fear to be quite penetrable. You will be surprised at your ability to move through it is directly related to your perseverance to reach the other side.
This idea about working through my fears has never left me and I feel it was Divine provision as my mind is bent to fear. I am thankful that the words of Christ uttered the most in the Bible are “Fear not”. Jesus knew our natural affinity to fear and thus spoke so much against it out of His love for us.
I have a hope that no matter how many valleys, peaks, or deserts lie ahead that I will press on until it is time to go home. In the meantime, when ideas of failure and emotional bankruptcy dangle in front of me, I will penetrate those thin walls of fear and continue to live a life that will leave a legacy for others to benefit.
That is my hope for all of you who may read this note.
-Mica

4 tips for the fellas

Sat, 20 Feb 2010 22:23:18 -0800

1. You are not as disrespected as you think!
Many guys worry that they are not established as a man in their own universe, and it drives some of us to do some extreme measures in hopes we will be respected by other men and loved by women. Truth is, you earn respect as soon as you give it. No matter who it is, give to them and people will start to take notice a man has entered the room.
2. You’re not as cool as the mirror shows you!
I’ll admit I have spent a good deal of time in the mirror dialing in the looks, the smiles, the laughs, the poses. I am a guy, and I want to feel cool and act it. However, I have been reminded many times that I am perceived better and more approachable when I am the first to admit that I am not the best at everything! Also, please save the one-upper stories.
3. Be a man that loves!
Now I am talking legitimate emotions and having the emotional intelligence to love in many ways. Be honorable, be sweet, be intentional, and be consistent with those in your life who are difficult and not so difficult to love. Also develop depth in your relationships by being willing to trust and be vulnerable! More men need to lead with love!!! I cannot say that last line enough.
4. Integrity spreads Integrity
The opposite only erodes and rots the core of who you would like to be as a man. Duplicity, lying and superficial relationships with others only makes you what you put into them. Find other men who you can share the deep places of your life with. Chances are they are dealing with the same things and the biggest lie a guy could believe is they are alone in what they are dealing with!

I wrote this post as a means to get all these tips on the forefront of my mind as I feel these are ideas that all guys should develop on their own and the women in their lives who love them should encourage them to be such men and nothing less!
-MMM

Are you Reactive or Proactive?

Mon, 8 Feb 2010 21:09:33 -0800

I watch one Football game a year, the Super Bowl. Mostly because of the commercials and also because of the opportunity to hang with a friend or two and just relax. This year I was surprised at all the risky plays that were taken on by the New Orleans Saints. However, there was no other play that I loved more than the interception by Tracy Porter that locked the game in the 4th quarter. As you watch the replay you can see how this man was tuned into every move of the Colts quarterback, Payton Manning. It was as if Porter could see the future seconds ahead and before anyone could react, Porter was inches from the end zone.
This play got me thinking about a fundamental truth we all share. I even used math (Sorry).
Stimulus + You= Reaction
Looking at this simple equation many may see it as life is simply a response to the stimulus and circumstances we all face.
Reality is that we have been given this under utilized tool that makes us human. It is called CHOICE.
The way I see it, life is more like the following:
Stimulus + You/ Choice = Response
No matter what the situation is you and I have a choice. It can’t escape us.
The sad truth is there are so many little decisions in our day that we have learned to respond in ways that are reactive and may show up as
defensive, selfish, hurtful, or some other means that brings negative or less than desired results.
Football players spend hours on the field, training their minds senses and bodies to respond in ways that become essential tools in the game.
We too have to build into our daily lives the mental exercises that crush reactive responses.
I say live proactively and don’t just wait for that big “whatever” to ruin your day. You ALWAYS have a choice and I encourage you to start building into that now!
-MMM
Read this, it changed my life 7 habits of highly effective people

I peel oranges oddly...

Fri, 5 Feb 2010 20:55:15 -0800

We are all so odd, I love it! As I peeled my orange this evening for a snack I realized that I probably do this differently than others. Then I thought about how my father-in-law peels bananas by biting the bottom off of them.
Truth is we all have a sense of normalcy that others consider odd or different. Most of us in life are so concerned with hiding the things that are odd, different, and unique!
Well I say forget that! Let our oddities be known and let us appreciate each other for our weirdness!
Here are 3 oddities about me! I encourage you to comment by writing 3 down about yourself to symbolize your sense of self pride and appreciation!
3 Oddities about me...
One eyeball is bigger than the other.
I can’t say the word “cinnamon”.
I have to eat two kinds of cereal at once!
-MMM

Forgotten Friends

Tue, 2 Feb 2010 21:02:40 -0800

I saw these shoes on my walk from downtown today, and they immediately caught my attention. These once rugged shoes had been discarded and ignored and their fate sealed to rot in the yard. The weight they bore of their previous owner was evident in the creases of the leather and the warping of the soles. The moss and lichen now residing on top told me they had been there for some time and many surely have witnessed their poor condition.
They reminded me of how friends in my past have become distant and just as removed as these shoes. Suddenly, I found myself wondering how the distance occurred in certain relationships. Do my friends ever think about me? Do they feel ashamed as I at the moss that has grown in our relationship?
I think it is worth considering and evaluating those who may come up as the mind recalls those who were involved in past seasons of life. Some relationships have ended and they served their purpose. Make peace with it.
Others, may have some miles in them still like these rugged shoes. Seek them out and be willing to remove the the distance and the stink of regret.
After all, they are still good shoes!
Who are you thinking about now? Consider bringing them back in your life in a respectful and meaningful way that honors them.
-MMM
(If you would like to read more, visit www.mymicamoreno.com)

No Signs

Sun, 31 Jan 2010 22:41:04 -0800

I had just finished a photo shoot with my friend Jason, when I dashed back to my office downtown. I had to park near the Church I used to be employed by when I noticed a group of young guys skateboarding on the steps of the newly remodeled patio.
I knew this because being one of the oldest Churches in my town I was keen to the plans that went on to update it in my days working there.
The young boys (13 yrs old or so) were doing their kick flips and manuals, landing on their hips and using the beautiful rails that were laid out before them.
TWO thoughts went on in my head at once. One, how cool that these guys were drawn to the Church in Proximity in the first place. If I was still doing Youth Min there, I would have considered this a serendipitous blessing.
Second thought, was what a shame that the college guy, who I knew to be involved in the functions of the Church, felt he was doing his job to ask the young guys to move themselves 10 feet off Church property and not to skate here.
I paused to watch the boys reaction to the request.
Snickers, and F bombs were dropped and the boys felt it was ridiculous.
Asking them to not Skate there was communicating to them that the Church does not accept a part of them.
Now, of course there are things as liabilities to consider, and the efforts it takes to maintain the paint on the rails and the integrity of the bricks, or the uniformity of the concrete to be free of blemishes.
There are a number of angles that this brings up in my mind and the message was clear to me as I read the very bold and impressive NO signs .
Will those boys ever set foot in a Church now? Will they ever get a chance to be accepted by the “Body of Christ”? Who knows and my hope is that God is bigger than signs of cans and can-not’s.
If He wasn’t I would not be able stand my image in the mirror every day.
What is most important?
Broken Bricks or Broken Hearts?
Perfect Pitch of Worship or being able to approach God?
Programs or People?
Full Pews or Full Spirits?
These are the questions I ask the Church I love!
Be the Church, be loving even if it leaves you wide open and vulnerable.
-MMM

It’s Okay, I can Screw it up

Thu, 3 Sep 2009 19:52:15 -0700

I hate disappointing others, especially friends. I am really hard on myself like most people. Also like most people I tell them its okay, I forgive you. However, I find it hard the other way around. So here is my 3 STEP plan to getting over things.
. 1.Breath, if needed, remove yourself from the situation. Deny the lie that you deserve this or that you are not as valuable in any way the moment before the issue and collect your thoughts on what has occurred.  
. 2.Stand tall. the issue will only move forward if you plant your feet firm in the ground and face the issue. Don’t lie, don’t make excuses. Accept that you can screw up. Show character and think long road, not just pot hole in front of you.  
. 3.Seek peace. If the issue causes pain or discomfort do something positive to counter it. Laugh, take a walk, hit the gym, See that you can live through and past this hard time and it will get resolved or you will get over it.  

Of course there are so many things one can do but these are three things I am currently teaching myself to do to realize “It’s okay, I can screw it up!”
Mica

Hands Full

Tue, 11 Aug 2009 15:23:40 -0700

I wake up almost every morning with my two pups licking my hands and feet on the edge of my bed. It is their daily request for a walk, a pet, and in some cases a time to cuddle. I like it, Lori doesn’t. Men and their dogs right?
I was alone with the kids and knew I couldn’t ignore the dogs need for a dash to the park any longer.
Now with Logan to bring along I have to become more creative and tactful in the approach.
I do miss the days of just doing what I want, but joy of my family has replaced that carefree time and loneliness that existed before them.
I don’t know why it has been so hard to feel rested lately but I think I am constantly ignoring my bodies cues of exhaustion and I continually self medicate it with cups of coffee. However I was determined to make it out the door while the morning was cool and calm.
It was a great walk with Logan under my chin strapped in, Isabelle in one hand, and the pups on a double leash on the other.
I usually get stares in this set up, but I don’t mind. I feel like this shows that I am a fully loaded, fully committed family man. As we walked a 1/4 mile to the park Isabelle would stop occasionally to let her zebra toy feed on the neighbors grass clippings, and the dogs would sniff every tree we pass.
When we got to the park I did my usual scan of the horizon to see if we had other dogs that could be potential victims to my unleashed terrors, I usually flash back to a time when a poodle went airborne from the pouncing that it experienced. Today we weren’t clear and so I stayed the dual brood of fur to my side. Immediately the prospect of a playground romp was replaced by the fortunate timing of our outing. “Sprinklers”, Isabelle yelled! The remainder of our time was spent capturing the streams of water, chasing miniature rainbows and finally letting the dogs off leash, don’t report me on that last fact.
I enjoyed the simple joy of my children and pups, and the warm sunrise illuminating the wet grass at my feet.
Saturdays are always special it just takes time to slow down and breath them in. I am realizing today that I need to slow down to just rest and still my mind. May others do the same.